I've been working as a DevOps engineer at a small startup for about a year and have roughly three years of total experience. I'm comfortable working independently and often take the initiative to improve workflows, but communication with my manager has become extremely difficult.
I'm rarely given formal tickets. Most work is assigned verbally with very little context, so I usually create my own task lists and send progress updates through Teams. My manager often doesn't respond for days, ignores updates, rarely attends our one-to-one meetings, and may leave work unreviewed for months. During meetings, he sometimes ignores direct questions and then says he heard me when I repeat them.
A recent example involved deploying a product to an isolated test environment. I asked for a short discussion about the existing production setup, but never got one. I researched the requirements, designed the infrastructure, completed the deployment, and shared the result. A week later, my manager said some resources needed to be redeployed. When I asked two specific questions about what he wanted changed, he said we would discuss them in a meeting. During the meeting, he remained silent when I asked the questions and then dismissed my follow-up by saying he had heard me.
I'm responsible for implementing infrastructure, but not for making the architectural decisions myself, so I need occasional clarification and sign-off. I've tried creating tickets, sending written updates, contacting him directly, and asking questions during meetings without overwhelming him. Nothing has improved, and the situation is affecting my confidence, motivation, and mental health.
How can I stay professional, continue learning, and protect myself when priorities and technical decisions aren't communicated? Am I expecting a reasonable amount of management support, or am I being too needy?
5 Answers
It’s possible your manager avoids answering because he doesn’t know the technical details or doesn’t want to admit uncertainty. Regardless of the reason, the impact on you is the same. Don’t interpret the lack of feedback as proof that you’re incompetent; delivering independently for a year under these conditions is evidence that you’ve been handling a difficult environment. Set a reasonable deadline for getting decisions, document the consequences of delays, and make a measured plan to leave if communication and support do not improve.
This may be a normal startup problem where your manager sets broad priorities but expects you to find and execute the work yourself. Try building relationships with the senior engineers or whoever actually owns the architecture. They may be better positioned to answer technical questions and clarify what the business needs. That kind of autonomy can be excellent for learning, but only if you have access to someone who can make or explain the important decisions.
Escalate the problem in a neutral, task-focused way rather than presenting it as a personal complaint. Explain that you need architectural input to complete a deployment, list when you asked for it, describe the decision currently blocking you, and ask who can provide the required approval. If your manager has someone above him, involve that person before the situation damages your performance or mental health. You aren’t asking for constant supervision; you’re asking for decisions and feedback that your role depends on.
At your experience level, you should be able to identify and pursue work independently, but that does not mean you should have to guess about architecture or priorities. There’s a difference between autonomy and being abandoned without context. Keep moving where you can, state your assumptions clearly, and ask for confirmation when a decision has broader consequences. Meanwhile, start looking for another role with stronger mentoring and structure. You don’t have to resign immediately, but you also don’t need to wait until this situation seriously harms you.
The behavior you described is dysfunctional, especially ignoring direct questions and leaving work unreviewed for months. Keep a factual record of assignments, decisions you requested, dates of follow-ups, what you delivered, and any unresolved blockers. Send concise written summaries such as, “I’m proceeding with option A because I haven’t received guidance. Please let me know by Friday if you want option B.” That gives him a chance to correct course and creates a clear record that you were acting reasonably.
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